I AM NOT ADDICTED!

‘So, I read an article about a woman who was addicted to going out. It made me think of you’, she said. Well mom, I’m not addicted to going out… ‘Let me speak, that woman was in her thirties and she just wanted to go out every weekend and more times a week. She loved to shop for outfits to go out. She loved the attention. She loved the drinks etc etc (My hearing system went on Mute).  ‘Mom, I’m not addicted to going out’. ‘But Charlie, you’re going out a lot right? More than once a week, right?’, my dear worrying mother said. ‘Mom, I’m 21 and I like to go out. Doesn’t mean I’m addicted’!!

I AM NOT ADDICTED TO GOING OUT

In Holland you start going out when you’re like 15 of 16 years old. That’s the time that you go clubbing for the first time, get drunk for the first time and start making out with random people for the first time. When you turn 18, you can enter more clubs (with older people) and buy some stronger alcoholic drinks.  The real clubbing doesn’t start until your 21. At this age, you can do pretty much everything. You can enter almost every party (except the 35+ parties, but do you want to attend those parties right now?!) and you actually find out that you don’t have to get drunk to have the best evening of that week. You’ll do this until you’re done doing it.

Well, I’m not done yet. I didn’t go out like crazy when I was 16, 17, 18 or even 19 and 20. At first, my mom didn’t want me to go out. When I turned 18 and went to the university, I started going out on the thursday student nights. Which were fun, but I didn’t really go out on the weekends. Only sometimes when there was a real awesome party, but that was it. I had a boyfriend at that time and worked in the weekends, so I didn’t really feel like it. Since I turned 21 and became single for the first time in my adult life, I took advantage of it. Big time. 

Major reason for me to go out: Music and dancing. I looooove to dance. I always dance. I dance in my room, in the kitchen, in the shower and even at work I have to bust a move sometimes. I just have to move. I love dancing! Dancing is my way of expressing myself. I believe I was born dancing. My mom can tell you a lot of stories about me dancing. In a group or just alone: I was always dancing. I used to wake up and started driving my mom crazy by dancing!

I miss dancing. I didn’t go out this weekend and didn’t get my regular exercise (I did go to the gym and danced salsa on friday, but this doesn’t really count as going out like a die-hard and do that 5 hours non stop dancing thing I always do). Because of this lack of dancing, I feel the urge to dance coming up again. I feel like I have to surrender to the music again, feel free like a melody in the wind. I want to be one with the music. Be the keys of the music; and all other metaphors you can make. So, I checked Facebook to see all the parties this week and I suddenly got  a reality check: I Really Love Going out.

Events this week that I really want to attend and probably will:

– Tuesday: ESN Social Drink: Pre-Farewell party @ BED
– Thursday: ESN & Fatale presents: Farewell Party: Go Hard or Go Home!
– Friday: L’Ambiance @ Club Vie
– Saturday: Housequake @ Best

Well, I’m totally going to the hottest and sexiest party of the month: L’Ambiance at Vie and to the house festival Housequake, all the way in Best. Still thinking about the other two times to go out. I really want to, but should I? Wouldn’t that make me look like an addict? Can my body take it?

Questions raised: Am I really not addicted to going out? Am I at the first stage of addiction: Denial? Or is going out my one and only true love?